Oh My Gourd!

 

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Thanksgiving is such an interesting holiday to me – it’s a time to spend with family or friends and just really absorb the love and fortune you have surrounding you.

Last year, I was in a really different place in my life. I was fresh off a train from New York and reminiscing about Barcelona. Everything was really, truly beautiful and I was so grateful for that. I was going through some really weird life changes and enjoying every moment of it.

This year…life has thrown a lot of curve balls my way and enjoying the weird changes is something far from my heart and mind. But, nonetheless, to focus on the negative instead of the positive would be the antithesis of the season.

Here’s what I’m thankful for this year…

I am thankful for vulnerability. Opening up to my ex and friends in the past few months has been really interesting but relieving. It’s been refreshing to have people that didn’t run from me when they saw who I am, and for the ones who did run, it’s been nice to move on and not feels as if I am living two different lives.

I am grateful for hurt. I know, this sounds really odd. But I am thankful for this. I spent many weeks this year curled up in bed, a box of tissues by my side, and The Office on full blast. I’ve gathered 21 years of friendship and 6 years of dating, and I was constantly there again. I “put myself out there” a lot this past year. I was kind and honest. What is the lesson? I’m at a loss for myself but I’m painfully optimistic that in 2018, I’ll be thankful for the answer.

I am full of gratitude for airplanes. It seemed like moving to Florida was my worst nightmare (location wise). But with the help of jet fuel and on the wing of a prayer, I was able to travel and escape life’s problems with my favorite people. I spent a large amount of my weekends in new and old places, and I’m so glad I am fortunate enough to leave parts of my heart across the country and the world.

I wanted to end on a positive note. I am thankful for the satisfying moments in life. The little things that aren’t really little. The satisfaction of a city that resonates with me, and returning to it in time to see the golden hues of autumn among the sunlight. A person who comforts me. A familiar voice that sounds like velvet. My favorite spot (@ every East Coast city). My dog that provides a sigh of relief as I see his goofy face sprinting towards me. And, the scent of a holiday – the same no matter where I am and despite the years that have gone by.

I feel exhausted and it’s been nice to head to my parent’s home and enjoy the comfort of my childhood bed. So, here I am, in all my thankful glory holding onto the hope that blessings will continue to come and the turkey will never be dry. Happy (belated) Thanksgiving, I’m thankful for all of you that sit through my written monologues and support me from afar. Cheers to you.

photo-nov-30-10-21-15

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